Baby shower etiquette when your life is split between three places

There’s an etiquette to baby showers. You’re not meant to organize your own, but it also shouldn’t be a surprise. You don’t want to ask someone to host it, but you secretly hope that someone will offer to. And it should preferably be held where your friends live, which can be tricky, when your life is split between Australia, Toronto and Waterloo, with some wayward friends now living in even farther-flung places like Vancouver and Finland. What’s a pregnant girl to do?

Thankfully, this girl has some pretty amazing friends. I have been avoiding the topic with my Toronto gals because I didn’t want to put anyone on the spot. If I mentioned it, they might feel compelled to arrange something, so I thought it best to just let it be. Yes, I could have arranged my own shower at our house (lord knows I rarely follow societal conventions about such taboos), but that would have required my mates to spend about 3 hours in a car so that they can spend about 3 hours eating my experimental baking. Not exactly an amazing offer for them!

And then my gorgeous friend T. forced me to confront the issue this weekend. Now, the first thing you need to know about T. is that she’s a super chick from beach-territory in Australia. We used to cover court cases together (she for TV, me for print), until she up and left to marry a quite fab Canadian. The other thing you need to know is that she is also pregnant. Very pregnant. She’s due in April, and yet when she found out no shower was planned, she insisted on hosting one at her place.

The upside of this plan is that T. doesn’t have to travel to the event. The down side is that she might be giving birth at the time. Forget having a “rain date”. We’re going to have a “labour date”! Still, we have a tentative date, a tentative guest list (again, not too many, because I want this to be hassle-free for a heavily-pregnant woman), and I have yet another example of how generous, thoughtful and considerate people are towards first-time mums. Ah, we should all be so lucky.

Tamara + Ten bellies

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One thought on “Baby shower etiquette when your life is split between three places

  1. Oh that’s so lovely of her!!!!!! I remember having to organise mine and being 7 months pregnant with Bells Palsy it was hard work just organising the invites let alone the catering. You’ve got a good friend there Ten xxxx

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